Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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