Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
