I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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