god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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