Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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