I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize