but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
