This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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