Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
