bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
