I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
