Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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