just tell him i said nine months
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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