well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
