Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
