my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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