whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
