I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
