I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Randomize
