she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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