Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
