I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
