Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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