I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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