Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
