She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
