Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
In other news, I just burned my penis
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize