turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
