Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Randomize
