There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
