what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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