i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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