Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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