I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize