then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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