i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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