Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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