Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
