Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
