There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize