Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
