im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Randomize
