tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Why can't burritos get me drunk
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
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