I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
