Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize