I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
