maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
