i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Ladies don't puke and tell
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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