i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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