Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize